Want to know the quickest way to destroy trust?
Violate your promises. The Big Big item in every relationship is to “do what you say you are going to”. It can be with your boss, employees, team member, customer, supplier, spouse, friend, child or anyone you encounter. Keeping your commitments is paramount to building trust!
What happens when you make a commitment? You build hope, when you say you will do something and you build trust when you do it. Think about this before tossing out “I will…” The flip side is being so vague that nobody can get you to agree to anything, this is damaging too. Be courageous and willing to give your word and follow through with it.
This might appear to be common sense, but what is common sense is not always common behavior. How to break the declining trust. Decide how you will live and continue to make it different in your behavior and example towards others.
5 Steps you can take to move forward
1. Focus on your capability to repeat a pattern of actions that tell people “you do what you say”. The more you become aware, the more you will make the better choices.
2. If you make too many commitments and are overextending yourself, than start to prioritize and reduce by saying “no”.
3. Make deposits into the bank – the emotional bank account as you implement. Say – Do – Follow through and you will notice how you are building the Trust Bank Account.
4. Next time you have to make a commitment. Stop and ask, is this realistic? Its better to disappoint someone its easier to do at the beginning than when time is running out. Make sure you repeat the pattern of doing what you commit to.
5. Recognize the trust you build at home is one of the most important areas. If you are single, its with the 5 people you are around most. If you live with family, its those people in your house. Pay attention to how you communicate and how people expect you to behave once you say it.
How Trust Works
Whatever your situation, you need to get good at establishing trust. This starts with learning as much as you can about how it works.
Some questions to ponder, who do you trust? Someone at home? At work? A Parent? A friend? What has transpired to establish trust between you and that individual? In my personal relationships it is a matter of character and behavior. At work it is often competence and track record. You need to decide what is critical to you.
In reality, it is really character and competence that permeate the relationship and contribute to establishing trust.